March, 11th, 2019. Phineas O’Shields. I always like starting my diary entries with my name as I rather enjoy the sound of it. It’s a proper name for a proper dog like myself who has an incredible amount of projects going at the same time. This blog, for example, is indeed one of the many projects that I must manage, and though my dad Charlie does his best, for a human, I’m quite sure I could write it better if I’d only learned to type. Thankfully, with modern technology, I can just speak in dictation and everything is magically typed and translated for me. Yes, Google Translate, so apologies in advance for anything that comes across as a bit weird or regrettably insane. And do forgive my intrusion as I’m quite sure my dad was going to do some prompted post for today, no doubt something silly, but I asked him to sketch me and gave my permission to post this instead. It was starting to feel a bit rude to simply hide in the background when I know my fans would be eager to hear what I have to say. It doesn’t matter how small you are or how small people might make you feel, you should always take the time to speak your mind. So, this is what I’d like to say today.
Yesterday, I caught Charlie reading a blog post aloud to Philippe that was all about me. The post itself was written by another dog, who apparently has impeccably good taste, named Freddie Parker Westerfield. Note to self, must ask the dads what middle name they’ve given me, though best not to ask just after I’ve pulled the cotton out of the couch cushion again. But, in my defense, it’s a hideous couch and all of my efforts to subtly send that message have, to date, sadly failed. And all of my Alexa orders for a new couch made while the dads were out have been mysteriously cancelled. At any rate, I was pleased that Mr. Westerfield set the record straight on several key points. I’m, not an ultra-conservative, of course, I just believe only what I can see with my own two eyes and am generally distrustful of everyone. For example, this time of year my dads talk about something they call a “tornado” and since I’ve never seen one, I know they must simply be a myth. It’s not rocket science. Though I’m not entirely sure what that expression even means. And I don’t take credit for anything I didn’t have a paw in as that would be horribly tactless. It’s just that I’m rather sure that, from the way my dads act, they couldn’t live without me.
And since diaries are meant to be a place where we’re allowed to make little confessions to ourselves, I guess I can mention that I really couldn’t live without them either. Sure, I may sniff in dissatisfaction when things don’t go properly around here, but that’s just a bit of training. Even the best dads need that. The world couldn’t possibly understand our hopes and dreams if we didn’t make them known. And since I spend the majority of the day curled up in a ball and sleeping, I have more dreams than are possible to count. I still remember my dreams from years ago now, when I was sitting in that orphanage and hoping suitable parents would arrive and take me home. Yes, I’m adopted, if I failed to mention that, but that doesn’t mean that my dads aren’t really mine. Unlike tornadoes, I see them every day, so I know they’re real. We’re a tiny family, but one built on a firm foundation of love and treats. There’s really nothing else required to live a happy life. Though, since you’ve no doubt read by bestselling book entitled Good, you probably already know that. (NOTE TO EDITOR: “add Amazon link here”… NOTE FROM EDITOR DAD: “Sorry, I couldn’t find it, buddy. Must have sold out again…”). I’m getting a bit tired, so I should probably curl up in a ball and have another nap. I know this may make me seem a bit lazy, but truly, it’s really just taking a bit of time to dream again.
About the Doodlewash
Da Vinci Paint Co.: Yellow Ochre, Opus (Vivid Pink), Terra Cotta, and Cobalt Blue. Lamy Al-Star Safari Fountain Pen with black ink and sepia ink in an A5 Hahnemühle Watercolour Book. Want to purchase a print of this doodlewash? Send me a note with a link to this post, and I’ll add it to my shop!