I was asked if I would draw my Halloween costume this year, but not planning to attend a party, I don’t have one. Also, it’s the 2nd #SelfieArt Day started by my pals Teresa Robeson and Kirk Livingston and I wanted to participate. I just wasn’t sure how to answer both challenges in a single doodlewash.
I have many pairs of glasses, but today I’m wearing the very first pair of glasses that Philippe picked out for me. I decided these must be in my Cabinet of Curiosities and might just help me solve my dilemma. So I present to you my latest treasure, an extremely conceptual selfie, and my Halloween costume for this year – The Invisible Man.
These particular glasses are special to me because Philippe was still in Paris when he helped me pick them out. At the time, we had no idea that we would ever actually end up together in reality. After sending him multiple selfies of me trying on various pairs of glasses, this pair was his final choice. I figure they qualify as a self-portrait because on justifying his selection Philippe had said, “They just seem the most you.”
As for being The Invisible Man, now that I think of it, this would be a ridiculous costume were it possible to turn myself invisible. In order to achieve the effect of floating glasses, it would also mean attending the party entirely in the nude. Which, for the majority of parties, is still considered taboo. But I guess since it would be impossible to actually see me, I could only offend people who had an inordinate distaste for Ray-Bans.
The concept of being The Invisible Man is fascinating to me, not just for the ability to hide in plain sight, but for all the questions it evokes. For example, if while attending this Halloween party naked, would it be considered rude of me to sit on the host’s furniture? When greeting my friends, would it suddenly seem inappropriate to hug? If someone else decided to attend the party as an actual naked person, would my costume be mocked for its lack of authenticity?
These little what-if scenarios that play out in my head are usually what stops me from attending parties in the first place. It’s even more exhausting because now everyone assumes after months of not seeing them, that you’ve been scouring their Facebook page and know everything that’s been happening with them. Unfortunately, that’s precisely what I haven’t been doing.
I show up to the party like a clueless fool who’s suffering from a terrible case of amnesia. I’m too cheery with Sheila who just lost her father, I smile and ask Joe how’s he’s doing after he was just diagnosed with cancer, and I forget that it’s Stephanie’s birthday. Even though that was apparently the very reason for this regrettable affair.
In my daydreams I imagine myself a favorite guest and someone who can happily mingle with anyone who comes along. But in reality, I’m that awkward, uninformed guy who just said the wrong thing. And although, I’m quite thankfully fully clothed, I’m red-faced and suddenly wishing I could just become The Invisible Man.